Talk:Crybabies & Cologne/@comment-12859245-20121112022637/@comment-5350859-20121112024734

Hey, it's a good start, but I think you should pace the story just a little bit slower, there are also a couple punctuation and grammatical mistakes, and I would try to not use texting talk when writing a story!

I hoped my constructive criticism gave you something to work on! :)

- The person who still can't get fanfiction to work to post her stories