Backups & Breakups/Transcript

<!--What? - Nobody knows Trish better than me. Something's up! She went to the movies with somebody. Dez, do you know something? Uh uh uh uh uh Me gotta go to class. "Uh uh uh uh uh. " Five "uh"s? He does know something. Trish is dating somebody! Welcome to the auditions to be my new back-up dancer. Thanks for coming out. Those of you that stink, thanks in advance for wasting my time. Just the fact that you showed up here today means You're a winner. Except we are only looking for one dancer, so the truth is Most of you are losers. Okay, let's see what you got. ( Dance music playing ) Woo! ( Music stops ) Woo! Wow, that Roger guy is really good. I don't think anyone's going to beat him. I like him! Let's hire him. Hang on, we still have one more dancer. Trent! Here you go. Um, I just want to thank you guys so much for this opportunity. It means so much to me, and I would do anything to make it. He seems very driven. I like him! Let's hire him. I think we should see him dance first. ( Dance music playing ) All: Woo! Woo! Okay, it's clearly between Roger and Trent. Totally And Dez and Mr. Conley and the juggler. Everybody was so good. Uh, we can't hire everybody. Trent is the guy. He's exactly what you're looking for. Right, Dez? I totally agree with Trish. Trent's our guy. - Okay, I'm convinced. Trent it is. - Yes! Ha! I'm glad that's over. I feel so bad for the people who don't get picked. Like in "The Timid Heart," when Emma chooses Richard over Gabe. He was devastated. Not that I would know because I didn't see it. So what do you say I take you guys out for some tiny pizzas to celebrate finding a dancer? - Yeah! - Oh, I can't. I got something to do. And so does Dez. Dez saw "The Timid Heart. " You know what that means. Trish went to the movies with Dez. He is the "we. " Trish is dating Dez! Dez is dating Trish! Each of them is dating the other one! Ally, come on. The idea that Dez and Trish are secretly dating is Ridiculous, impossible, and completely, totally True. ( Theme music playing ) I can't believe Trish and Dez are dating. It's surprising, but I can kind of picture it. ( Cut to a montage of romantic scenes with Dez and Trish which only seem to exist in the shared imagination of the pop-star and songwriter. ) ( Both shuddering ) Okay, maybe it's a little hard to picture. I don't know why Trish didn't tell me. We're supposed to be best friends. She probably feels weird about it. You know Because it's weird. What if they break up? How are we going to work together or be friends together? I just don't want it to change the way the four of us hang out. They'd feel the same way if we were dating. Me and you? ( Laughs ) That'd be weird. ( Laughs ) Really weird. - Ally: Totally weird. - Austin: Yeah, weird. - (Dance music playing ) - Five, six, seven, eight and one. So, haven't seen you since yesterday. Let's catch up. I'll go first I don't have a new secret boyfriend. Okay, your turn. Shh! I'm trying to watch the new back-up dancer. Three and four, five, six, seven, eight. And one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Cool! Take five. There's drinks upstairs in the practice room. It's driving me crazy. Why won't they admit they're dating? Maybe we got it wrong. Please, I know Trish better than anybody. She's definitely dating Dez. Ally's acting strange. And that's unusual because? She's acting like she knows something. Did you tell her about my boyfriend? I haven't said anything about you two. You didn't tell them my secret, did you?! Look at them, they're so in love. They can't keep their hands off of each other. Get your hands off me. I haven't said anything. This is ridiculous. I'm going to say something. - Ally, wait, I - I'm sorry, guys. I can't keep pretending. We know your secret. Fine, you got us! I knew it! You and Trish are dating. Both: Huh? What? Ewe! No, my secret is that I love romance movies. Trish caught me at the theater when she was on a date with her new boyfriend. I knew you had a new boyfriend. So if it's not Dez, who is it? I've been secretly dating Trent. My new back-up dancer? How long has this been going on? Well, it all started in third grade when I saw "Letters From a Lover Lost. " I'm talking about Trish and Trent. It's only been a week. But we saw you and Dez hugging at the locker. Oh, I was so happy that Trent got the dancing gig that I had to hug somebody. Wait, back up. Dez, you like romance movies? No, I love them! The passion, the heartache, the emotion. They live the love we can only dare to dream. Can we just focus on one secret at a time? Trish, how come you didn't tell me about Trent? Because I didn't want the fact that we were going out, to influence Austin's decision on who to hire. You didn't want to influence my decision? You're kidding me, right? Pick Trent, pick Trent, pick Trent, pick Trent, pick Trent, pick Trent! Pick him, pick him, pick Trent, pick Trent, pick Trent! It means a lot to me that he was hired on his own merit. Hey, guys. Ally, Dez. - Sorry, what was your name again? - They know about us. And you guys are cool with it? Totally cool with it. Austin, I promise we're not going to let our relationship get in the way of team Austin. Awesome. So, Trent, what do you say we get back to rehearsal? - Let's do it. - Oh, he can't. I'm making Trent take me to see "The Wedding Diary. " It starts in like 15 minutes. "The Wedding Diary" is out already? Listen, guys, I have to go. I have practice for Sports. In case I cry during the Sports. ( Chanting ) My best friend has a boyfriend. My best friend has a boyfriend. - My best friend has - Ally, please stop singing that song. I just love love. So tell me, what's Trent like? He treats me so great. And he's so much fun to be around. Look at this bracelet he got me for our one-week-iversary. It says, "Trent's boo. " ( Squeals ) I haven't seen you this happy since Dez got that tuba stuck on his head. That was a good day. Listen, Ally, I'm sorry I didn't tell you about this right away. That's okay. I understand. I gotta run. I'm gonna get fired from my job at the nail salon so I can spend more time with my boo. ( Squealing ) Oh. Babe, please don't be mad. You know I only started dating Trish to get the gig as Austin's back-up dancer. How do I know you're not just saying that? You haven't even gotten me anything for our three-week-iversary. I got you this. "Trent's boo"?! I love it. You're gonna break up with her, right? Yes. Yeah, I just I have to figure out how to let her down easy, you know, so I can still keep the gig. Trish's boo has another boo? Boo! ( Beeping ) Great to see you, mom. Oh! You too, Ricky. How's Africa? Oh, it's great. This has been one of the most, fascinating research expeditions yet. Okay, Ricky, don't touch my book. Give me my book. Hey, Ally, guess what? Lula the gorilla She gave birth to twins. Aw! I named this one Ally, because she's so creative. And this one Trish, because she's so tough. And also because she sleeps a lot. Speaking of Trish, I need some advice. She has a new boyfriend Oh, I love love! ( Chanting ) Your best friend has a boyfriend! Your best friend has a boyfriend! Yeah. But I found out that he's only using her to get in with Austin. - She's going to be devastated. - Oh. That's tough. But you're going to have to tell her. You'd want her to tell you if it was the other way around. You're right. Thanks, mom. I love you. I love you too. Would you like to see video of Lula giving birth to the twins? Uh ( Makes static sound ) Sorry, mom. You're cutting Talk to you later. ( Theme music playing ) - You say bye first. - No, you say bye first. - You say bye. - You say bye! - No, you say bye. - Nuh-uh, you say bye. Bye! Okay. I'll see you later. What was that all about? Trish, we gotta talk. What is it? Uh My mom named a baby gorilla after you. Really? Aw! And Trent has another girlfriend and he's only using you so he can be Austin's back-up dancer. ( Laughs ) Please, that's ridiculous That you would be so jealous that I have a boyfriend, that you would make up such a horrible story! But, wait. You wouldn't make up a story like this, would you? Because you're my best friend. And you would never want to hurt my feelings. And this was probably really hard for you to tell me, which means It must be true. That jerk! How could he do this to me? I'm so sorry, Trish. We are totally ready to shoot this dance video. I worked out this move where me and Trent do this thing You can't use Trent. He's no good. What are you talking about? He's really good. He's one of the best dancers I've ever worked with. No, he has another girlfriend. He's just using Trish. That's terrible. Oh hey, guys. Okay, Trish, give him a piece of your mind. It's all you. - Listen, Trent, you - I'll handle this! Listen, Trent, you mess with Trish, you mess with all of us. She is a great person and you don't deserve her. Yeah, nobody gets to be mean to Trish except me. We're mean to each other. It's kind of our thing. Well, technically, she's more mean to me than I am to her. Okay, that'll do, Dez. I thought you really liked me. I do really like you. You're cute, you're fun, you're tough. And if I wasn't so focused on my career, I could totally see us together. What about your girlfriend? Mmm. Right. There's that too. I'm sorry, Trish. I never meant to hurt you. Well, sorry or not, you're fired. All: Yeah! You heard him. Wait, this isn't about Trish. I think you're just firing me because you're afraid I'm going to show you up. Please. Nobody's a better dancer than Austin. Really? I challenge Austin Moon to a dance-off. ( All gasping ) Oh no, he didn't! You don't need to prove anything to him, Austin. You're right, Ally. ( Laughs ) Hear that, everybody? Austin is scared. ( All murmuring ) Do it, Austin. Do it for me. Humiliate that jerk. - Let's do this. - Woo! Yeah! Dance-off! We got a dance-off! ( Dance music playing ) I'm so fresh I'm so fresh right now ( All gasping ) Yeah. My, I'm so fresh. Organically farmed and picked to my best. High tops and my crisp white shades. Girls pass me by like, "oh, my days!" I bet you've never seen style this wild. Step out the car with - Woo! - Yeah! Ain't nobody that's fresher than me. You ain't fresher than me, ain't nobody that's fresher than me. Yeah, you ain't fresher than me. Ladies say, "who's that guy? Who's that guy? He's so fly". Ladies say, "who's that guy?" Yeah, that's me, that's me, that's right. Ladies say, "who's that guy? Who's that guy? He's so fly". Ladies say, "who's that guy?" Yeah, that's me, that's me, that's right. Ladies say, "who's that guy? Who's that guy? He's so fly". Ladies say, "who's that guy?" Yeah, that's me, that's me, that's right. Ladies say, "who's that guy? Who's that guy? He's so fly". - Yeah! - Woo! ( All chanting ) Austin, Austin, Austin, Austin! Austin, Austin, Austin! Austin, Austin, Austin! So I put the video of the Austin-Trent dance-off on the website. And it already got a ton of hits. People love it. - ( Both high-pitched ) What up?! - Oh, that's cool. But I still feel bad for Trish. To have her first love end so badly. She must be crushed. Like in that movie, "First Love. " Charlotte never loved again after the unnamed sailor betrayed her heart. Dez and I might have watched it last night. Austin cried. I did not. I had something in my eye. Yeah, tears. I'm sure Trish will be fine. It's just going to take time. It might be months, maybe years. Guess who got a new boyfriend! Roger? Yep. And just so you know, he asked me out after you hired him to be your new back-up dancer. Bye. Now that we're all here, let's celebrate the awesome new dance video With a cake from Mini's. - I call the big piece! - Okay wait, wait. Stop!-->