User blog comment:Ausllyshipper143/My new Auslly fan fiction!!!!!/@comment-5266452-20120806002708

That was good! it was rushed a little though. I would suggest if you ever write more ff to add more scenes and dialougue. That way it wont feel like you're jumping. Also, You shouldnt try to write in script form. When you do that it sometimes makes it harder for a reader to imagine the story. When you have it in detail in a certain POV the reader will get a better visualization. All in all I thought it was a good story for your first one! I hope to see more! :-P